Love “…seeketh not her own” I Cor 13:5

Sister Pat loves to quilt and anything that has the word quilt or quilting in it will catch her eye. So it wasn’t a complete surprise when Sister Pat announced that we were going on a road tour of the Quilt Gardens while on vacation. Because northeastern Indiana has a large population of Amish, the road trip was sprinkled with a large dash of black buggies and some super eating places. The gardens were neat, each one designed after a quilt pattern; but after the first few, I was ready to return home and maybe take a dip in the swimming pool. Of course, that didn’t happen.

Since I know that Pastor Jim’s idea of fun isn’t running around looking at different quilt patterns, I asked Pastor Jim why he was pampering Sister Pat so much on this vacation. Pastor Jim explained that love and marriage is not about seeking your own needs but about seeking the needs of your mate. He explained that being a pastor meant that often his time was spent meeting the needs of others and that he always devotes a lot of his vacation time to meeting only the needs of his wife. He said that makes for a happy mommy bear and happy mommy bears make for happy daddy bears.

I guess he knows what he is doing because Pat sure is a happy bear. Still, I became very tire of sitting in the gardens and fell asleep several times in the car as Sister Pat went into detail about each quilt pattern and every flower that was used. Pastor Jim just smiled and listened carefully as he drove to the next quilt garden. And, that is the Bear Truth.

Crock Pots & Microwaves

Bear Truth tagged along with Pastor Jim and Pat to their church’s annual marriage retreat! This appears to be a time when married couples dump their kids with relatives so they can act like kids for a weekend. It was also a time for the ladies to be pampered and the men to play the role of white knight.

There were some serious moments, when the group would allow it, for the guest speaker, Bro Rodney, to share some insight about marriage and the marriage relationship. For example, the first night I learned that men are like microwaves and women are like crock pots. Men tend to quickly make decisions and act while ladies are more prone to think things out. Men heat up quickly while the gals come to a slow boil. I can testify of this to be true between Sister Pat and Pastor Jim. I can also confirm that, while these differences can be a source of conflict, they can also be a source of strength and can actually complement one another.

However, I do have a problem! Every time I now look at Pastor Jim, he looks like the broken down microwave we carried to garbage a few years ago and Sister Pat looks like the shimmering new crock pot we purchased last spring. Don’t tell Pastor Jim but that is the Bear Truth.

Witticisms about Marriage

"All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest--never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principle of equal partnership." -Ann Landers, Ann Landers Says Truth Is Stranger..., 1968

"For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the one miracle the Vatican has overlooked." -Bill Cosby

"All young women begin by believing they can change and reform the men they marry. They can't." -George Bernard Shaw

"Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century." -Mark Twain

"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." -Mignon McLaughlin